Frame Work Of Relationships, A Reality



I questioned a kid “from where we get wheat?” I got very real and practical reply; “from reliance fresh” (reliance fresh is corporate retail chain in India) for some moment I found it funny but then, I realized that actually that kid was right. For him wheat comes from reliance fresh. For him it was a reality that wheat comes from super stores, he was not aware about real source. My mind stuck up with a word, REALITY, a small term, often ignored or taken for granted in our daily has very deeper meaning(s) in it.

Every individual, community or society has different perceptions to view things, and this perceptions makes them believe true whatever they see, feel or experience. Obviously we don’t believe in things which we haven’t seen, felt or experienced. It is crystal clear that reality is social phenomenon.

Surprisingly, reality is not same everywhere and to everyone, and is changeable. Let’s take language as reality, which simply collection of symbols and sounds. Relation of basic units of language (alphabets) makes word, when word is related to object(s) it creates meaning(s). Language as a system keeps updating (some words gets added while some gets deleted) over a period of time.

In same manner, human relationships are also reality, but its bit complex and needs conscious thinking on it. By humans are basic units of society and they share various kinds of relations with other individuals in society. Relationships are ‘given’ from birth to death and we spend whole life for the sake of relationships, majority of our time is spent on drawing line of control in every kind relation(s). This line of control is internally (by attitude, behavior etc) drawn and some are externally drawn by others (by government, society etc).
Every relationship has definite set of roles (or say mutual obligations), these roles defines an individual as person (i.e. brother, sister, wife, husband etc) in society. Every individual is expected to perform actions according to his/her roles; failure in doing so will create problems in life.

Successes of relationships are directly depended on its Acceptance/legitimacy and acceptance is again depended on ideology, values and beliefs of that society. Actually, acceptance provides answers to individuals about what are supposed to do, what could they do (and what they can’t), when to do and even how to do. Any failure in answering this question leads to breakdown of relation at various degrees (emotional, social, legal etc).

Breakdown of relationship may also occur when any of unit (individual) resists perceiving same meaning of object or event. For instance, Thumbs up in western perception is all the best while Indian perception can be “thenga dikha diya” (I give a damn). If such perceptions (or interpretation) if not accepted or understood in its real context it may create hurdle in relationships

Whatever I wrote is not new to us, its objective reality of relationships; it’s simply a framework of our relationship systems, we just apply different cloths on this framework according to or needs life. 

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