Flirting- way to healthy friendship !!!

Life of social science researcher now a day resemble me to life of postman whose bag is full of variety of letters but he is untouched to the content of letters. Letters of love, hate, marriage, death etc. makes no difference to his life or job. His duty does not allow him to share any emotional bonding with things he delivers. He is never responsible for what he delivered, whether its hate or love, sadness or happiness. Professionally he works round the year, does his duty without any complain. This thought served as kind of commiseration to me when I decided to spend festive time at university for some the sake of work, deadlines and in long terms for duty :) 

  

At same time I got some turbulent thoughts over the word “despo” (meant for guys who are desperately looking for girls) in conversation with intellectual person on Facebook, however conversation was friendly and specific, this word was used in response of specific kind of interaction called flirting. Flirting is much used but less defined word, as a format of interaction which least trusted, most abused and always misinterpreted. I had(have) been facing “charges” of flirting but I don’t have problem with that due my personal perception to it but when it is miss interpreted as “despo” kind of interaction. It becomes necessary for “postmen” like me to explore hairline difference between both of it without getting emotionally attached to “charges”.

Flirting is purest form of interaction where individual praise other person in romantic manner without any expectations.  It is safe, friendly and honest as people who are into such interactions aware about their emotions, they are aware that words used are fake. This adds to humor and creates more friendliness among people involved into such interaction. Flirting allows to get break from dull routines and sometimes makes people stronger as well as smarter. Bodily gestures and verbal interaction is always in controlled manner so that person on other side should not get hurt. Such controlled behavior increase tendency of sharing, caring and respect among friends. Friendship started with flirting is long term friendship as people involved in it know what to take seriously and what not.

While “despo” kind of interaction is opposite to it, it means praising person to emotionally force him/her to get into relationship.  It is feeling of getting someone (or something) to fulfill certain intensions. Interaction driven by such feelings leads short term friendship. It has penchant to hurt people and distort dignity of others as well as self. Those who fail to judge feelings (intensions) laying under interaction called flirting can face serious emotional consequences at later stage or may emotionally hurt some other individual.

Only personal experience and intellect can make judgment about difference between “despo” kind of interaction and flirting. Country like India is facing pendulum swing situation between traditional and modern values, traditional values creates “despo” interactions wrapped into flirting and this creates less trustworthiness about people who flirts. It becomes necessary for person who is flirting or facing flirting to understand undelaying intensions of flirting interactions. Once, these intensions gets clear among people involve in such interaction can lead better, long term, healthy friendship.