Why I praise Raam and not Ravana?
The stories of Ramayana has
always stirred my thoughts since childhood. Different characters of this epic,
whether its Manthara, Dashratha, Viswamitra, Janak, Bharat, Guha, Jatayu, Hanuman, Angad, Shugriva, Vibhishana, Surpanakha,
Sabari or any other are interwoven in my
decision making in personal and professional life. This Dussera, I received
many WhatsApp memes, Facebook and Twitter posts praising Ravana and accusing
Raam for not taking care of his own wife. This forced to me share my thoughts
here.
First admiration of Ravana is
found in argument that “Ravana respected Sita though he abducted here”. It is
clear from stories that Ravana kidnapped Sita. But it’s not Ravana who
respected Sita, its Mandodari (ravana’s wife) who didn’t allowed her husband to
bring “other women” in house without consent of that women. Mandodari forced Ravana
follow basic rules of household (were one cannot forcefully bring women in
house) and told him that if fails to abide these rules, the city of Lanka will
burn to ashes. That’s why Sita was kept in courtyard and Ravana strived to get
her consent to his wife. Raam ofcourse “Won” Sita, but married to her with
consent and commitment (of not allowing other women in his life), while Ravana cheated
Sita as well as his own wife. Cheating a women and showing her respect stands
as invalid principle for me.
Another interesting argument
exists that “Ravana was great scholar
and devotee of Shiva”. A person who has
abducted someone’s wife, a person who has urged a war wherein his sons,
brothers, soldiers & subjects died and still don’t want to let go his
desire and ego is definitely not a scholar.
Some folklores about Ravana
says that Ravana demanded Parvati (wife of Shiva) to be his wife, Shiva (since Shiva
is beyond social definitions, he don’t understand concept of wife) says its ok…Ravana
can take away Parvati…Parvati gets furious on this boon and scolds Shiva…on
what basis he gave away his wife…Shiva said…he can’t understand idea of
wife…wife is not property nor its responsibility… nothing is wrong in gifting
best creation of nature to a devotee like Ravan …Shiva said it a gentle
smile….and also said, that he cannot take back his boon…so Parvati creates
replica of her from female frog…which was given to Ravana as a wife named Mandodari.
This makes it clear that Ravana worshiped Shiva for the sake of fulfilling his
desires and lusts which do not make him true devotee.
The episode of “Agnipariksha”
is also very popular and debated. The recent versions of Ramayan (especially
Tulsidas Ramayan which appeared after Manu Smirit upholds caste system and
patriarchal values) focuses an idea of chastity of women. It says that Raam
forced Sita to walk through fire to prove her chastity as she stayed in someone
else’s house for a year without her husband. But in original version (Valmiki Ramayana)
it’s a very romantic episode where Sita intends to purify herself as soft and
shining as gold before meeting her husband after long time. The romantic scene
of wife dressing up (purifying) for her husband is interpreted in very narrow
terms. Raam and Sita never had an issue of trust, they both trusted each so
well that they never ever demanded proof of commitment or chastity from each
other (some tv series used Agnipariksha incident to spice up melodrama).
The most important episode of
Ramayan which influenced me a lot is when Raam asks Lakshman to takeaway Sita
from palace of Aayodhya and drop her in forest. Raam justifies this act by
saying that he cannot compromise with ideals of serving people as a king. As a king,
he has to support ideas of his subjects however cruel it is and however
personal sacrifice it demands. Sita understood dilemma of her husband and moved
away from palace to forest without any argument. She knew that Raam is ideal
king of Aayodhya (unlike Dashratha who fought many wars and had three wives or
unlike Bharat who set entire administration of Aayodhya on “auto pilot” mode
when Raam was in forest) , and if she’ll argue to stay with him, Raam would
also join her in forest. She wanted to Raam to serve Aayodhya and became role
model for upcoming generations. Thus, Sita resolved the conflict between
professional life and personal life for Raam. Also, Raam fulfilled his commitments
to Sita by not re-marrying to other women after Sita left.
Raam thus choose his
professional life over personal life… principles over rule…. sacrifice over
pleasure…. duties over desire…. loved with empathy...allowed his kin to
flourish...he served his nation…with all wholehearted support from his beloved
wife, family and clan….
On other side… Ravana choose
personal life over professional life…broke rules…sacrificed others for own
pleasure…loved with lust…choose exploitation over empathy…forced his kin to die
for him…. he ruled his nation…with no support from his wife, family and clan…
and that’s why I follow Raam
and not Ravana…..
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